In 1982 I faced one of the most difficult decisions of my life.

I was one year out of law school and just a month away from ending my clerkship for a federal judge in Billings, Montana. Lying before me were two very different career paths.

The Crowley law firm offered me a position as an associate attorney. This was the premier law firm in Montana, so they could launch my career with superb mentoring, top clients and an excellent salary. It was the opportunity of a lifetime.

The other career path offered only an inspirational vision.

Shortly before graduation, I had learned of a concept called “Christian conciliation,” a process by which Christian attorneys would help people resolve lawsuits through biblical mediation and arbitration instead of going into civil court, as taught in 1 Corinthians 6:1-8. This concept was being promoted by the Christian Legal Society, yet they had only created an inspirational vision, not a plan for professional development.

There was no mentoring, no clients, no funding strategies, no training, no rules of procedure. Even so, this vision has grabbed my heart, and I sensed God calling me down this path.

The Crowley attorneys had been waiting patiently for my decision for months, so I was not surprised when I received a call asking me to meet with two of their partners. When I entered their office the next day, I was still agonizing about which path to choose and fully expected them to ask for a decision.

But instead, they handed me one of the greatest blessings of my life.

The two attorneys I met were named Dave Johnson and Art Lamey. They greeted me warmly and asked how my clerkship had gone. After exchanging a few more pleasantries, Dave said something that changed my life.

“Ken, we realize you are torn between our offer to join our firm and your interest in exploring the mediation/arbitration program you described to us in our earlier conversations. Our partners have discussed this, and we don’t want to force a decision on you before you are certain of the kind of legal career you want.”

“We still hope you will eventually join our team, but we don’t think now is the time. So, we are going to hold this position open for you while you explore this other program. We want you to take as much time as you need so you can make a confident decision.”

I was stunned. Rarely in my life have I received such a gift of grace. I felt like God had used Dave and Art to place a safety net beneath me as I sought to discern whether God was calling me practice law or go into full-time ministry.

I walked out of that room on a cloud of thankfulness and peace, and thirty days later I began the process of launching the Christian Conciliation Service of Montana, which eventually grew into Peacemaker Ministries and then Relational Wisdom 360.

At the beginning, we struggled to generate revenue, so my paycheck hovered around $500/month. Many times, I doubted whether the ministry would ever become viable, and I was often tempted to throw in the towel and accept the Crowley offer before they lost interest in me.

Year after year, however, Dave called me to ask how the ministry was doing and to let me know that the firm was still holding a position for me. God used Dave to give me a sense of safety and the courage to persevere as the ministry slowly grew.

By the late 80s, we were financially stable, and it was clear that I was on the path God had set for me. So, during Dave’s last call, I thanked him for the firm’s gracious support and let him know that I would not be changing course.

Fast forward thirty-one years.

I was sitting in the Billings airport in 2021 waiting to catch my flight, when I saw Dave and his wife sitting nearby. He had aged greatly and was stooped over in his seat. I knew instantly what I needed to do.

I walked over to Dave and knelt before him so he could see my face.

“Hi, Dave,” I said. “You probably don’t remember me. I’m Ken Sande. Years ago, you gave me a great blessing.”

After describing the Crowley firm’s generous offer and the repeated reassurances he gave me that they were still holding a job for me, I said, “Dave, you have no idea how much your kindness blessed me and impacted countless other people.”

“Thanks to your reassurances, I persevered with the ministry I founded. My wife and I have written books that have sold over a million copies in 20 languages. Churches around the world teach these principles to their people. Hundreds of attorneys are applying these skills to stop divorces, settle lawsuits and guide clients through conflict in a way that restores broken relationships. The principles have even been taught and applied in the U.S. Congress and on military bases around the world.”

“Your kindness played a huge role in the development of this ministry. I just want you to know how grateful I am and how many people have been blessed through you.”

Tears welled up in Dave’s eyes as I spoke to him, and he and his wife were crying softly by the end of my report. He took my hand and thanked me repeatedly for sharing this news with him. The look of gratitude on his wife’s face clearly said, “I’ve known for years what a wonderful man I’m married to. I’m glad someone else knows that, too.”

We soon boarded our flight, and when we disembarked in Minneapolis, they thanked me again for talking with them. Then our paths diverged.

Three months later, on May 20, 2021, I learned that Dave had passed away at the age of 81. When I heard that news, I prayed, “Thank you, God, for giving me the opportunity to thank Dave for the way he impacted my life.”

So, why am I sharing this with you?

Because everyone one of us has been blessed in countless ways by other people—parents, siblings, teachers, employers, pastors, coaches and mentors–and some of those blessings ripple through our lives for years afterwards. But all too often, we fail to circle back to thank these people for the ways they blessed us.

So let me encourage you to do two things.

First, don’t wait until it’s too late. Ask God to remind you of the people he’s used to bless you over the years. Thank him for those people, and then seek them out in person, with a phone call or with a personal letter, and tell them how much you appreciate what they did for you in the past. Your words could bring those people great joy in the twilight season of their lives.

Second, ask God to open your eyes more fully to the people you could bless in the days ahead, just as Dave, Art and the partners at the Crowley firm blessed me. Even your simplest acts of kindness could ripple far beyond anything you could imagine and touch lives far into the future.

~ Ken Sande

Permission to distribute: Please feel free to download, print, or electronically share this message in its entirety for non-commercial purposes with as many people as you like.

© 2026 Ken Sande

Would you like to receive future posts like this? Subscribe now!