The Golden Result

We all know the Golden Rule: “Do to others as you would have them do to you.” But do you know the Golden Result? It’s a direct corollary to the Golden Rule: “Other people will usually treat you the way you treat them.” Not always, but usually. Because that’s how God made us. I’ve seen this […]
Three Steps to Building Relational Passports

I have dozens of passports, and I need to renew them constantly. No, I’m not James Bond or Jason Bourne. I don’t fly from country to country using alternative identities to evade the NSA, CIA, or MI6. I just love people. I enjoy meeting, understanding, encouraging and helping them. And for that I need a […]
The Compassionate Boxer

Would you like to grow in relational wisdom? If so, please take a few minutes to watch a brief clip from the movie, Cinderella Man, which is packed with some of the best examples of relational wisdom I’ve ever seen. Russell Crowe plays the part of a real life hero named James J. Braddock. Once […]
How to Lose an Airline Seat … and Win a Friend at the IRS

It’s never smart to offend someone who has discretionary authority over your life. Such as the ticket agent I watched as she juggled an overbooked flight. She was waiting for two couples who had confirmed seats but had not yet appeared at the gate. I was on standby and would not make the flight if […]
Spanglish – The Secret of Being Influential
Today’s post features a 3-minute video clip that illustrates amazing relational wisdom, including empathy, self-control and the brilliant use of a single perceptive question that penetrates a teenage girl’s heart and changes the course of her life. These are the kinds of relational skills that can impact your friendships, improve your parenting, deepen your marriage […]
What You Can Do About Racial Tensions
As I watched the George Floyd memorial service this afternoon, I was grieved more than ever by his tragic death, the loss that his family is feeling, and by the fact that thousands of people continue to feel deep pain and fear because of the ongoing racial, social and cultural tensions in our land. These […]
Are You Relational or Informational?

Many pastors are much better at imparting information than they are at building relationships. They are comfortable in their studies. They love their books. They pride themselves on their sound doctrine. They come alive in the pulpit as they proclaim “the wisdom of God” through carefully-crafted sermons. But when it comes to engaging their […]
Really Nice Pants
In today’s movie clip, Will Smith demonstrates the enormous benefit relational wisdom (RW) can have in the workplace. The clip comes from the movie Pursuit of Happiness. It is based on the true story of Chris Gardner. In the weeks leading up to this scene, he ran out of money and has been trying desperately […]
The Compassionate Boxer

Cinderella Man is packed with examples of relational wisdom. Russell Crowe plays the part of a real life hero named James J. Braddock. Once a successful heavyweight boxer, Braddock was reduced to poverty by a broken hand and the Great Depression. After losing their home, he and his family were forced to live in a […]
Destroy Your Enemies

As the Civil War was coming to an end, it seemed inevitable that the North would prevail. President Lincoln had many discussions with administration “hardliners,” who hotly opposed his intention to be merciful and generous to the South. During one particularly heated conversation, one of those men rebuked Lincoln, saying that the North must “destroy […]