Christian Conciliation Service® Biblical Conflict Resolution
Resolve Conflict, Reconcile Relationships, Negotiate Agreements, Restore Peace
Conflict Is Painful...
But It's Also An
Opportunity
We know how painful conflict can be. Whether it’s a strained friendship, a stab on social media, a critical coworker, a marriage headed toward divorce, a threatening lawsuit or a church plagued by division, conflict can suck the life out of us.
But don’t give up, because conflict also provides an opportunity to experience and model God’s peacemaking wisdom and grace.
RW360’s vision is to equip, empower and assist you to respond to conflict in ways that promote justice, encourage reconciliation and inspire personal growth.
We provide this assistance in three phases.
Phase 1
Personal Peacemaking
You can use personal peacemaking skills to resolve most conflicts on your own.
Phase 2
Informal Conciliation
Informal mediation by trusted leaders can settle more difficult cases.
Phase 3
Professional Conciliation
Certified Conciliators can provide formal mediation or binding arbitration.
Phase 1
Personal Peacemaking
Many conflicts can be revolved personally and privately when people learn and apply the basic principles of peacemaking (see Matt. 5:9; 5:23-24; 18:15). Therefore, before you seek conciliation assistance, we encourage you to diligently study and apply the principles set forth in the first three chapters of Guiding People Through Conflict, which provide practical guidance on how to identify the underlying causes of conflict, how to confess, confront and forgive wrongs, how to negotiate just and reasonable agreements and when to seek outside assistance in resolving a conflict.
You will also find helpful guidance for personal peacemaking by completing the Transformed by the Gospel Bible Study.
If you apply these simple but powerful principles with prayerful humility, you will be surprised how often your example will trigger the “Golden Result ” as people begin to treat you the way you are treating them (see Reconciled by a Baby Moose).
Phase 2
Informal Conciliation
If you are unable to resolve a conflict through your own personal efforts, the next step is to seek assistance from your pastor, a church leader or a spiritually mature friend (see Matt. 18:16; 1 Cor. 6:1-8). Guiding People Through Conflict provides detailed guidance on how these individuals can assist you through informal conflict coaching, mediation or binding arbitration.
If other individuals are willing to assist you but need advice on how to do so, they may request guidance from a trained conciliator through RW360’s Conciliation Hotline.
For a real life example of informal conciliation, see Pastor Resolves Texas Football Scandal.
Phase 3
Professional Conciliation
Although many conflicts can be resolved through personal peacemaking or informal conciliation, some conflicts are so complex that it is wise to seek the assistance of professionally trained conciliators. Such assistance is especially helpful in these types of cases:
- Serious conflicts within a church or ministry leadership team, including cases of moral failure, governance deadlock or long-term discord.
- Serious congregational conflicts, especially when the leadership team has little training or experience in conflict resolution or has lost their credibility with a significant portion of the congregation.
- Disputes that involve complex legal issues or significant financial or property rights.
- Marital, divorce or childcare conflicts that a leadership team is not trained to address.
- Cases involving emotional trauma, power imbalances or abuse (physical, emotional, sexual, child, elder, spiritual, etc.).
The Handbook for Christian Conciliation provides a detailed description of a formal conciliation process, including Rules of Procedure, Frequently Asked Questions and our Standard of Conduct for Christian Conciliation.
Professional conciliation typically costs between $150 and $200/hour and may cost over $500/hour in complex cases. Therefore, RW360 encourages parties to make every effort to resolve a conflict through personal peacemaking or informal conciliation before using the form below to submit a request for professional assistance. We also encourage you to read the FAQs below prior to submitting a request for assistance.
Frequently Asked Questions
How does conciliation deal with trauma, power imbalances and abuse?
Conflicts involving emotional trauma, power imbalances or abuse (physical, emotional, sexual, child, elder, spiritual, etc.) require the involvement of conciliators or other professionals who are specifically trained to deal with these types of issues. If your situation may involve any of these dynamics, please indicate that when submitting a request for assistance.
Many abusers become skilled at twisting biblical principles to their advantage, including the principles taught in The Peacemaker. Therefore, if you are in an abusive situation, we encourage to read Peacemaking and Abuse.
If there are credible allegations or signs of significant abuse, we will usually require an independent investigation to unearth hidden facts and patterns before proceeding with a conciliation process. When searching for qualified faith-based abuse investigators, we encourage you to consider these best practices.
If you are dealing with a situation involving domestic abuse, we recommend that you contact Beauty from Ashes directly, which specializes in providing conciliation and support services in these situations.
Do conciliators provide legal advice?
RW360 and our conciliators do not provide legal advice or representation. If the situation you are facing requires such assistance, please contact one of these organizations:
- Brotherhood Mutual Legal Assist for Ministries (free advice on many practical and legal issues faced by churches and ministries; before contacting them, please see these Six Tips for Resolving Conflict in the Church – Brotherhood Mutual Interview with Ken Sande)
- Christian Legal Society Christian Lawyer Directory (contact information for Christian attorneys)
- Christian Legal Aid: This network of local ministries provides access to legal aid services for the poor, the marginalized, and the victims of injustice in America with the love of Christ.
Can you provide examples of how Christian conciliation works in real cases?
Yes. Click here to read about real life cases involving kidnapping, church division, sexual abuse, negligence and contract disputes, some of which triggered multi-million dollar lawsuits.
As a pastor, how can I get training on how to apply these principles more effectively in my church?
The best way to begin upgrading your relational and peacemaking skills is to take RW360’s free Relationally Wise Leader course, preferably with your entire leadership team. You can deepen your relational skills by taking our RW Shepherd course.
As an attorney, how can I apply these principles in my practice and get trained as a Christian conciliator?
You will find detailed guidance on these principles by reading Attorneys as Peacemakers.