Three Qualities that Improve Every Relationship
After mediating hundreds of divorces, lawsuits, forced pastoral exits and church splits, I have learned that these types of conflicts usually involved one or more parties who lacked three critical character qualities: humility, teachability and flexibility. To put it in a positive way, if you want to avoid major conflict and enjoy a life-long marriage, […]
100% Responsible
When my wife was an elementary school counselor, students were often sent to her office because of conflict. As they told her their stories, many children would go to great lengths to paint themselves as victims and others as being to blame for the problem. Corlette would listen patiently and carefully. After they made their […]
7 Ways to Redeem an Offense
A while ago, I received a complaint from a woman who I will call Ruth (not her real name) regarding a video clip I used in one of my blog posts. The video is called “It’s Not about the Nail.” It features a graphic metaphor built around a woman with a nail in her forehead […]
Leadership Transitions: The Good, the Bad and the Clumsy
I’ve seen a lot of leadership transitions over the past thirty years as churches, ministries and businesses sought to pass the torch to the next generation. Like the characters in an old Clint Eastwood western, these transitions generally fell into one of three categories: The Good, the Bad, and the Clumsy (which often turned ugly). […]
Lincoln’s Relational Wisdom
The current political climate, at both state and national levels, has highlighted the close connection between politics, pride and emotion. In an outward sense, every politician is constantly striving to build credibility, prestige and influence by highlighting his or her abilities and positions while connecting with the values and emotions of the audience. In […]
Anything That Humbles Me Is Good for Me
Last week I had the privilege of hiking in the Montana wilderness with Rankin Wilbourne, a dear friend and pastor from southern California. As we shared about the challenges, blessings and setbacks we’ve both experienced in our personal lives and ministries, Rankin said something I will never forget: “I’ve discovered that anything that humbles me is […]
Public Confession Is Counterintuitive
Whenever we’ve done something wrong, our natural instinct is to conceal, deny or minimize our guilt. This dynamic began with Adam and Eve and is painfully evident in the current race for the White House. Sadly, it is also displayed in many churches, where both pastors and parishioners often give in to the tendency to […]
Approachability: The Passport to Real Ministry and Leadership
[et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ admin_label=”section” _builder_version=”4.16″ global_colors_info=”{}” theme_builder_area=”post_content”][et_pb_row admin_label=”row” _builder_version=”4.16″ background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” global_colors_info=”{}” theme_builder_area=”post_content”][et_pb_column type=”4_4″ _builder_version=”4.16″ custom_padding=”|||” global_colors_info=”{}” custom_padding__hover=”|||” theme_builder_area=”post_content”][et_pb_text admin_label=”Text” _builder_version=”4.21.0″ background_size=”initial” background_position=”top_left” background_repeat=”repeat” hover_enabled=”0″ global_colors_info=”{}” theme_builder_area=”post_content” sticky_enabled=”0″] Craig was well-equipped for teaching God’s Word. He was committed to Christ, thoroughly educated, solid in his doctrine, well read, loved to study Scripture, and could preach […]
R U Morally Superior?
There is one thing you must do in order to judge others, hold a grudge or indulge bitterness. You must constantly affirm yourself as being morally superior to the person you are condemning. You must think … “I have the right to judge you, because I am morally superior to you.” “I have the right […]
100% Responsible
When my wife was an elementary school counselor, students were often sent to her office because of conflict. As they told her their stories, many of these children would go to great lengths to paint themselves as victims and others as being more to blame for the problem. Corlette would listen patiently and carefully. After […]