Humility
Three Qualities that Improve Every Relationship

Three Qualities that Improve Every Relationship

After mediating hundreds of divorces, lawsuits, forced pastoral exits and church splits, I have learned that these types of conflicts usually involved one or more parties who lacked three critical character qualities: humility, teachability and flexibility. To put it...

100% Responsible

100% Responsible

When my wife was an elementary school counselor, students were often sent to her office because of conflict. As they told her their stories, many children would go to great lengths to paint themselves as victims and others as being to blame for the problem. Corlette...

7 Ways to Redeem an Offense

7 Ways to Redeem an Offense

A while ago, I received a complaint from a woman who I will call Ruth (not her real name) regarding a video clip I used in one of my blog posts. The video is called "It’s Not about the Nail." It features a graphic metaphor built around a woman with a nail in her...

7 Ways to Redeem an Offense

7 Ways to Redeem an Offense

I recently received a complaint from a woman who I will call Ruth (not her real name) regarding a video clip I used in one of my blog posts. The video is called "It’s Not about the Nail." It features a graphic metaphor built around a woman with a nail in her forehead...

Lincoln’s Relational Wisdom

Lincoln’s Relational Wisdom

  The current political climate, at both state and national levels, has highlighted the close connection between politics, pride and emotion. In an outward sense, every politician is constantly striving to build credibility, prestige and influence by highlighting...

Anything That Humbles Me Is Good for Me

Anything That Humbles Me Is Good for Me

Last week I had the privilege of hiking in the Montana wilderness with Rankin Wilbourne, a dear friend and pastor from southern California. As we shared about the challenges, blessings and setbacks we’ve both experienced in our personal lives and ministries, Rankin...

Public Confession Is Counterintuitive

Public Confession Is Counterintuitive

Whenever we’ve done something wrong, our natural instinct is to conceal, deny or minimize our guilt. This dynamic began with Adam and Eve and is painfully evident in the current race for the White House. Sadly, it is also displayed in many churches, where both pastors...

R U Morally Superior?

R U Morally Superior?

There is one thing you must do in order to judge others, hold a grudge or indulge bitterness. You must constantly affirm yourself as being morally superior to the person you are condemning. You must think … “I have the right to judge you, because I am morally superior...