One of the greatest heartbreaks a parent can experience is to be estranged from an adult child … which usually means losing contact with beloved grandchildren as well. That’s what happened to Karen when she offended her daughter, Debra, with a few careless words...
Are You Teachable?
I’ve been in the middle of hundreds of conflicts. Divorces, custody battles, business lawsuits, forced pastoral exits, church splits, nonprofit disintegrations … you name it, I’ve seen Christians fight over it. After many long and difficult mediations, I learned that...
A Better Way to Handle Abuse
Sexual abuse in the church does not have to end in broken lives, agonizing lawsuits, and divided congregations. When people follow God’s ways and words, these terrible incidents can result in healing, justice, and healthier churches. When victims of abuse first come...
Forgive Like Edison, or Better Yet, Jesus
Thomas Edison never claimed to be a Christian, but he did a better job of demonstrating forgiveness than many believers do. When Edison and his staff were developing the incandescent light bulb, it took twenty-four hours to manufacture a single bulb. One day he handed...
Embarrassing Sin, Comforting Forgiveness
I recently sent out an impulsive and sin-tainted email to a group of people whom I dearly love. Two brothers quickly and gently confronted me. I then had the humbling experience of emailing a detailed confession to the same group of people. But the embarrassment I...
Turning Assault into Reconciliation
One of the most dramatic reconciliations I ever witnessed involved five brothers and a sister who were fighting over their parents’ estate. Their relationship had deteriorated so badly that one brother nearly assaulted his siblings with a baseball bat. But then God...
Peacemaking and The Good Wife
Nine million people will soon be introduced to biblical peacemaking through an hour-long television show called The Good Wife. The Good Wife is a prime time CBS legal and political drama. Its central character is a woman named Alicia Florrick (played by Julianna...
Accountability: The Mark of a Wise and Protected Leader
Josh was slowly crumbling under a steady barrage of criticism. For a few weeks after he began as pastor, the people at his new church seemed friendly and supportive. But Josh soon discovered that many of them were perpetually dissatisfied. They constantly questioned...
A Time for Peace or War?
The following article is adapted from an article I wrote in the aftermath of the 9/11 attacks. I have revised it in light of the debate regarding Syria. While the geographical focus has changed from the U.S. to the Middle East, many of the issues and peacemaking...
Preventing a Breach
I learned the hard way how easy it is to breach a dam. When I was fourteen, my dad hired a contractor to enlarge a stock pond on our ranch by building a dam. It was ten feet high and thirty feet thick at its base. As the pond filled, we discovered that the dirt around...